Anne & Dorothy - A Lesson in Friendship

"$182.00 to go to a picnic!!?? I knew I had to do something." That's what Anne Parish said in explaining how her relationship with Dorothy L. went to a new level, and forever changed the course of Dorothy's life.

Their journey together started in January 1997 when the former coordinator of the PRCA office in Fulton, approached Anne, who is an interpreter for the deaf. Dorothy, who is deaf and blind, had been living in a local nursing home since 1990, and was in desperate need of someone to assist her in her efforts to communicate with nursing home staff - who had no formal training in sign language. Initial meetings between Anne and Dorothy went very well, and within a short time, Anne became Dorothy's advocate. As Anne said, "The coordinator threw the bait in the water and reeled me in."

Anne's presence made an immediate difference in Dorothy's life. When staff at the nursing home informed Anne that they planned to cut Dorothy's hair, Anne's response was, "Why don't we ask her?" (She didn't and it wasn't.) In most instances, Anne seemed to be successful in advocating on Dorothy's behalf. However, she realized that those "successes" related to relatively minor issues. When the issue was of major importance, Anne's input went unheeded. "I had no power," she said. That changed when, with the support of PRCA and the approval of Dorothy's family, Anne gained legal guardianship of Dorothy. In her new role, Anne was included in all planning decisions relative to Dorothy, and was able to obtain special funding that enabled Dorothy to attend a day program outside the nursing home. However, this funding did not extend to include transportation to social events, and when Dorothy expressed an interest in attending a picnic sponsored by a club in Syracuse for persons who are deaf, Anne learned that transportation to and from the picnic would cost $182. That's when she realized that she "had to do something."

What she did was to meet with a representative of the Helen Keller Institute to research possible options and seek advice. With the support of the PP:CA office and the local office of the Developmental Services Offices, Anne eventually gained the services of an attorney from Legal Aid, who prepared a lawsuit on Dorothy's behalf that called for her relocation to a more appropriate residence. The lawsuit resulted in Dorothy's move from the nursing home to an Individualized Residential Alternative in Oneida County, where she is able to come and go freely.

Pursuing a legal resolution was a difficult decision for Anne. She knew from the start that, if successful, it would probably mean that Dorothy would no longer live nearby, resulting in far fewer visits between the two of them. She said she asked herself, "What's more important: to be her friend or that she has a life?" Considering the life-changing impact that Anne has had on Dorothy's life, what better definition of "friend" could there be?

Walt Snyder October 10, 2003
Person to Person: Citizen Advocacy Newsletter

Sun	Mon	Tue	Wed	Thu	Fri	Sat
June 2004
		1 Pastoral Workers	2 Pastoral Workers	3 Liverpool Group 10AM - 2PM	4 NYSSD Family Day	5 Rome 5:15PM
6 Dewitt 10:30 Syracuse 9	7	8 Barber Shop 10 AM - 1 PM	9	10	11 Catechetical Leaders	12 Johnson City 5
13 Dewitt 10:30 Syracuse 9	14 Flag Day	15	16	17	18	19 Rome 5:15 PM
20 Dewitt 10:30 Syracuse 9 Fathers' Day	21	22	23	24 NYSSD Graduation	25	26 Johnson City 5
27 Dewitt 10:30 Syracuse 9	28	29	30

June Birthdays 1 Paul Ryfun 9 Mabel Edic 11 Valerie Allen 12 Fr Peter Williams 14 John Stevens 17 Frances Harmon 19 Kelly Jo Cutler 20 Mary Ryfun 23 Albert D Perry Jr June  Anniversaries 16 Maria & Ralph Mingolelli 21 Jennie & Bob Joseph

Fr. Peter  teaches at a Lenten get-together in Whitesboro

July Birthdays 10 Sue Weaver 19 Bob Thurlow Jr 20 Holly Kavanaugh 26 Robert Menotti 30 Ryan Lee July Anniversaries 6 Jim & Mary Margaret Van Damme    30 years

Another Lenten get-together in the South

August Birthdays 1 Justin Frechette 5 Matt Cutler 5 Jonah Frechette 13 Mattie Letham 19 Margaret Rocco 20 Sr Margaret Duffy Rachael & Rebecca Chmiel 30 Marion Baratta

Face painting in the North

Jolene Schill poses with Jesus statue, First Communion day

Keith Grant and Fr. Abe, First Communion day

Please pray for these friends who have died...and for their families who will miss them: Nellie Combs Bishop Frank Harrison Lorraine Coppola Vito Vaccaro and Angeline Starks

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Last wordsmithed May 24, 2004